What’s Next, Woody Woodpecker?

If we really want to protect kids, we have a long way to go. Why stop at the statue of David by Michelangelo with the prominent rock-solid dangling dong? (I’m surprised Viagra hasn’t used the figure in an ad, it seems a perfect fit. And I bet a few of the people supporting the ban could use it.)

What about museums showing exposed breasts, oh the horror. Close them all.

And what of DaVinci’s Vitruvian Man? What happens if children are exposed to such an image? What kind of example does DaVinci set for our youth when he creates illustrations of a naked man?

I have my own personal example of agenda-driven schools run amok.

I recall a class trip to Trinity Square Repertory Company in Providence, RI, when I was a freshman or sophomore in high school. I don’t remember the play’s name, but it had something to do with slavery and the interaction between black slaves used as surrogate caregivers for white children. Unfortunately, I only recall one line from one scene.

The actor, a black woman, was consoling a now grown man and said, “When you were young, I gave you titty.” This exposure to such pornographic trash is likely responsible for everything wrong I have ever done since then. What was the teacher thinking? Where were the guardians of morality when I needed to be saved?

Did they think it might stimulate me to consider the horrors and injustice of humans holding other humans in bondage—and the contradictions of some personal relationships fostered despite the circumstances—simply because of a characteristic skin color beyond the slave and masters’ control?

Or just focus on the “titty?”

The world is full of representations and writing about genitalia. What happens if they get a look at a vag… I can’t even say the word. They might start asking questions. And then there are other examples of what these heathens claim as art being used to groom our children with (glancing around to make sure no one hears the word) S. E. X. or other bodily functions.

And there were even more egregious examples of such filth they subjected me to as a child.

I mean, is there anything more clearly obscene than Woody Woodpecker? The very name sounds like the title of a porno film. We have to shield the children, or they might start asking questions.

And what about all those other programs one sees on T.V. or movies, or everywhere else in the world? I mean, Charlie Brown’s Christmas is obviously a recruitment vehicle for believing in imaginary beings, Linus’s speech about the meaning of Christmas aside. And what about Roadrunner and Wyle. E. Coyote? Glorifying violence. Pepe` Le Pew, obviously sexual aggression.

Sesame Street, teaching kids that inclusivity is important? Who wants that? And Mr. Rogers? A man in a sweater who wears slippers during the day. Come on, he’s a grooming machine.

And to point out something more contemporary, what about Disney’s Moana with its references to Maui as a Demi-God? Clearly, anti-Christian. Maybe the Gov of FL is onto something.

We should replace all of them with reruns of good old WWE well-choreographed blood and violence. You know, like when America was great. Bring back Chief Jay Strongbow and Classy Freddie Blassie.

Good parents monitor what their children read and encourage age-appropriate choices (or even better, read to their children.) Negligent parents try to block that which they cannot or will not understand and shift the burden of responsibility to others.

Joe Broadmeadow

We can ignore the daily gun violence, we can turn a blind eye to agenda-driven court decisions that chip away at a woman’s right to control her own body, we can deny the existential threat of fundamental religiosity fomenting violent racial segregation, but (insert your personal deity here) forbid we let a child read Freddy the Farting Leprechaun or, even more dangerously, try to instill an appreciation for art and the rise of rationalism in the Renaissance.

Or, (personal deity) forbid, a sense of humor.

Where does it end?

In Llano, TX, (you just knew something would come from Texas about this), the Library Commission threatened to close the library because a Judge ordered certain books returned to the shelves. The library commission said they removed them as part of a “normal weeding” process.

The judge called bullshit.

Here’s a quote from the CNN story.

“Reading a prepared statement, Cunningham said the books were taken from the shelves “for reasons unrelated to their content or viewpoints,” stating they were selected as part of a normal “weeding” process. The federal judge who issued the order had disputed this claim, noting that current members of the library board had previously called them “pornographic filth” and “C.R.T.* and LGBTQ books.
(* Author’s note: Critical Race Theory)

Books ordered to return to shelves included “Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents” by Isabel Wilkerson, “They Called Themselves the K.K.K.: The Birth of an American Terrorist Group” by Susan Campbell Bartoletti, and “Being Jazz: My Life as a (Transgender) Teen” by Jazz Jennings.”


Perhaps these books are not appropriate level reading for kindergarten or lower schools. But, if any children were reading these books at that age level, that might be a good indication of the quality of the school. At least they are excelling in reading. In my experience, many high school graduates have difficulty reading See Spot Run, if they can even read beyond a short tweet of acronyms for words, lol, omfg.

Now, books need to be appropriate for the child’s age. That’s what librarians are for, to monitor the books a child might check out. But using that excuse to ban books is just that, an excuse. Some prissy adults with obvious social development issues trying to validate their own beliefs by blocking anything they find distasteful or challenging to their concept of the world are the last thing we need.

Good parents monitor what their children read and encourage age-appropriate choices (or even better, read to their children.) Negligent parents try to block that which they cannot or will not understand and shift the burden of responsibility to others.

Some prissy adults with obvious social development issues trying to validate their own beliefs by blocking anything they find distasteful or challenging to their concept of the world are the last thing we need.

Joe Broadmeadow

Two of the books the library commission wanted to ban are very intriguing, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents by Isabel Wilkerson and They Called Themselves the K.K.K.: The Birth of an American Terrorist Group by Susan Campbell Bartoletti.

I am rereading Caste since the material is shocking to the senses and challenging to digest. I haven’t read the other—but I added it to my Kindle list since I am cursed with the ease of buying a book with the mere click of a thumb—but it doesn’t take a deep understanding of history to know the K.K.K. meets every criterion as a deadly terrorist group and is entirely devoid of social conscience or human value.

That the commission wanted to remove these two books seems like an unwillingness to acknowledge the fact that white people, regardless of their distance from the historical period of slavery, benefit from the racial gap slavery created. They find this distasteful to their rose-colored glasses’ perspective on history.

If the solution to our problems is banning books, where do we draw the line? That some places have removed The Diary of Anne Frank because of some “sexual” content they find offensive is the first step in whitewashing history and allowing such horrors as Nazism to rise again. While age-appropriate is a consideration, a 10-year-old is allowed into the Holocaust Museum where sexuality is about as far removed from the point as one could get. If a 10-year-old, a fourth grader, can handle depictions of the horrible treatment, murder of millions, and the attempted extermination of an entire group of people because of who they were, I think they can handle depictions of human sexuality by a similarly aged young girl.

The other target, perhaps the real target, of these attempts to ban items are books about trans-sexuals and the LGBTQ community. And just to put it in perspective. The estimates are there are 1.6 million individuals 13+ who identify as transgender. Not exactly an overwhelming invasion. Another point, only 1% of identified pedophiles are gay. The overwhelming majority are heterosexual. If you looking to protect kids from sexual predators the LGBTQ community is the least likely to commit such acts. https://stopabusecampaign.org/2017/03/10/are-most-sex-abusers-heterosexual/

The very idea that reading books about LGBTQ people can act as a recruitment mechanism promulgates the false premise that sexuality is a choice. This is idiocy. It is ignorance of the highest (or lowest) order. One’s sexual orientation is no more a choice than is eye color or height. It is genetically determined. Sometimes, nature makes a mistake and places a psychologically male or female person in a body that does not match physiologically. That individual didn’t choose to be born that way. Genetics defined it. We need to understand a phenomenon and learn to accept it, not reflexively and irrationally act against it.

I find it hypocritical that “religious” people, so willing to believe souls occupy humans, cannot or will not accept the fact that sometimes there is a mismatch between the biology and this “soul.”

This dichotomy of beliefs, that a soul exists but a person chooses their sexuality or can be compelled by a book or exposed genitalia to do so, is a sad commentary on the rationality and humanity of many Americans.

I’ll tell you one thing for certain. My grandson will not be checking out Freddy the Farting Leprechaun when he goes to school. He will already have read it, along with a host of others across a spectrum of topics.

Choose whatever book you like for your children and leave others to choose theirs. Perhaps, someday, we will all learn to accept things we may not understand and not feel compelled to eradicate them with either bans or concentration camps .

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2 thoughts on “What’s Next, Woody Woodpecker?

  1. Thanks, I agree. In 1957 I got fired from a babysitting job for reading the Mother’s copy of Peyton Place when she went out. I was 14 and my charges were newborn twins, I was mature enough to bath and feed these two babies but not mature enough for Peyton Place. LOL

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