Conversations

Conversations come in almost unlimited variety. They define many of our moments on this planet. Some we have daily, some only once. They can be combinations of types (first, last, only, memorable first, memorable last, one of many memorable, heart to heart). They can be between two people or many, each participant experiencing a combination of types (first, last, one of many)

Here is my list;

First conversations: filled with uncertainty and potential, can lead to one or many more, may be memorable or merely the seed that begins a new relationship. Sadly, I can recall very few first conversations. I know they occurred because, in many cases, I am still having conversations with that person. I suppose there really is no way to know if that first will develop further. Too bad, I’d love to be able to recall those first few words with the important people in my life.

Funny conversations: conversations wherein you make someone laugh, they make you laugh, or, the best kind where all the participants laugh. I recall having many of these. I suppose that may be a good measure of how my life has been enriched by others. I hope I have returned the favor.

Memorable conversations: We all have memorable conversations, some of which we wish weren’t. They may have been necessary, but painful. Then there those conversations that you will never forget. I sometimes have a hard time recalling my own birthday, telephone number, or even lunch, but I can still recall being told I was going to be a Father… Learning of a loved one’s death, told about receiving a promotion, having someone express thanks for something you did. All memorable, enduring, and in some cases, life altering.

Heart to Heart: We all have to have these. Sometimes we are the focus of the conversation. The focus may be of a positive nature, a rebuke of something we did or failed to do, or a life’s lesson taught by someone with more experience or a better perspective. We may choose not to remember these, but they have some impact. Some work, some don’t.

Death conversations: Having to inform, or be informed, about the death of a parent, friend, relative, pet, or other important life form in your or someone else’s life.

We all have these conversational experiences. If the latest research on the function of the human brain is correct, it is not that we forget our experiences, and thus our conversations, it’s that we lack the ability to reliably recall them.

But the fact is they are imbedded in our unconscious mind. Perhaps, influencing us in ways we may never know.

So the next time you have a conversation with someone, a friend, a lover, a child, a stranger, or two Yorkies named Ralph and Max (had to get my dogs into one of these), bear in mind your words are being written into memory.

They may recall your kindness, wisdom, and affection; or anger, rudeness, and mean spiritedness.

Make every conversation worth remembering.

I was Just Wondering

Did you ever wonder at what point you will realize you’re dead, or if there even is such a realization.

Some people see their imminent demise.

Some are looking in the opposite direction.

Some try everything to avoid the inevitable.

Some try to hasten it.

So what does one think about?

Regrets?

Joys?

Lost opportunities?

Successes?

Failures?

Vodka?

Or some combination thereof?

I believe it likely that most people in the “civilized” countries think,

“Now?”

“Really?”

“I just (fill in the blank)”

or

“But I just got (fill in the blank again)”.

And most people in those “third-world” areas think

“Finally”

I would like to die on my birthday. Not a specific birthday, preferably one in the distant future.

And not to make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

It would also make the Date of Birth and Date of Death symmetrical, at least the first two designators.

I would like this for no reason other than it allows me to live 364 days a year without considering Death in my daily list concerns.

No fear of not waking up, being trampled, struck by lightning, head ballet on a windshield, infections, heart attacks, shark attacks, bears, alligators, spider bites, food poisoning, or the several billion other ways to die.

Why do I suggest there are billions of ways?

Every person who ever lived, did, and every person alive, will. It is a reasonable conclusion that, absent evidence to the contrary, regardless how long life expectancy increases, everyone yet to be born, will as well.

If everyone died at the moment I finished this sentence it would be 7,023,088,208 deaths (June 29, 2012 21:05 UTC). All would be unique in time and space (well in space at least).

While there may be general similarities, accidental or on purpose, personal or random, public or private, each will be different.

The difference, other than the mechanics of death, is some are celebrated, some are mourned, some are ignored, and a very few are remembered.

Unfortunately, we tend to remember the death of those who embodied evil, rather than those who died at the hands of the evil.

So, if all goes well. I can write another 26 days worth of blogs, pause for 24 hours on July 25, just in case, and resume for another year.

Or I could write on the 25th, assuming I wake up, and hopefully it won’t end like thi……………………………..

Requiesecat in Pace