Rethinking Intelligent Design

Intelligent design, a version of religious creationism camouflaged as science, has many adherents but little actual science to support it. It is a hypothesis essentially premised on ignorance—we cannot explain something, say the origin of life on the planet, so it must have some intelligent design (aka an omnipotent being) behind it.

Up until recently, the success of trying to teach such babble in public schools has failed and been unmasked for what it is, religion with a fake college degree.

However, I think the time has come to revisit the idea of Intelligent Design because of a recent scientific discovery about the makings of a comet named 46P/Wirtanen. (Link to story)

So why would the appearance of a rather common phenomenon such as a comet support the concept of Intelligent Design? The answer is as simple as it is startling.

You see, Comet 46P/Wirtanen contains a high level of Alcohol in its tail. The comet is a cosmic happy hour streaking across the solar system. Such a phenomenon can only have one explanation, Intelligent Design.

As is with many things in life, there is a misquote attributed to Ben Franklin about God and beer. The actual quote, while a bit long to fit on a t-shirt, still invokes the divine nature of alcohol.

Franklin wrote—the original was in French as he was Ambassador there—to his friend, the theologian, economist, philosopher, and writer André Morellet (1727–1819):

“We hear of the conversion of water into wine at the marriage in Cana, as of a miracle. But this conversion is, through the goodness of God, made every day before our eyes. Behold the rain which descends from heaven upon our vineyards, and which incorporates itself with the grapes to be changed into wine; a constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy!”

Memoirs of the Life and Writings of Benjamin Franklin, by his grandson, William Temple Franklin, 1819

While Franklin may have seen a comet in his lifetime he couldn’t have known such a celestial phenomenon would be trailing across the solar system the very essence of what he saw as proof of a superior being.

While we may never be sure if this is the proof many seek, it is certainly an encouraging sign.

I wonder if I will live long enough to raise a class of comet-infused alcohol to the infinite mysteries of the universe.

It would seem to be the intelligent thing to do.


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